Magpa-Kailanma'y Mag-Kosa :-)

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dear kosa,

yesterday was your wedding day. ain't it funny, somebody told me it was on sunday pa! sorry for texting you on your honeymoon. hehehe.

nways, i am so happy for you and i know that you are happy too. God bless you and God's Gift to you in marriage!

http://www.pbase.com/chingkydoodles

i just read the five people you meet in heaven, by mitch albom, author of the international bestseller, tuesdays with morrie.

in the book, marguerite, the wife of, and love-of-my-life to eddie, the central character in the book, told eddie when they met in heaven, "life has to end. love doesn't."

kosa, my life with you has ended, to my deepest regret. but my love lives. it lives with me.

i still have your pictures. i still have the memories, short in time, maybe--it was only a matter of months; just over a year perhaps, but it was the longest time of my life that i have so far seen, complete with all the ups and downs. it was worth a lifetime.

i will still see the moon and the stars, and the beautiful mornings, and peaceful and quiet evenings. i will still see you. you are still with me. like i have told you before. you have become a part of me. you are here, below my hand, when i touch the left part of my chest.

enough said.

God bless, kosa.

suddenly, i hate that line: "everything that has a beginning has an end".

today, our story ends. it is kosa's 26th birthday. i love her so. i wish she knew how much it hurts. but better that she doesn't... well i don't know if she'll still get to read this. i guess not, unless i tell her so. but i've already said goodbye.

there are a lot of unanswered questions, and unspoken words still. and a lot of... "sana ganito, sana ganon..." and "what if..." kind of stuff... and today marks my fifth day of being sick. imagine someone who is physicall ill... and then becomes emotionally ill as well. it's as if... nway......

once again...

goodbye, kosa! i may have just lost you forever.... but may GOD continue to bless you on the path you have taken!

Kosa, tigil ka na mag-smile ha, masyado nang maliwanag ang gabi. ;-)
(Kosa, stop smiling already, the night is well lit already! ;-)

Sabi ko kay Kosa: Kosa, kanina pa ako naka-tingala, ganda pa rin ng moon!
(Me to Kosa: Kosa, I've been looking up to the sky, the moon is still beautiful!)

Sabi ni Kosa: Di ko makita moon e. Paki-hi mo na lang ako kay moon...
(Kosa replied: I can't see the moon. Please say hi to moon for me...)

Sabi ko kay Kosa: Hi Moon! Ang ganda mo! Ikaw ang nagbibigay liwanag sa aking madidilim na mga gabi. Kung maaabot lamang kita, ibabalik ko sa iyong ang aking lahat na pagmamahal...
(Me to Kosa: Hi Moon! You are so beautiful! You give light to my dark nights... If I could only reach you, I would give back to you all my love...)

Sabi ni Kosa: Talaga, sinabi mo yun? Makata ka pala!
(Kosa replied: You really said that? You're quite poetic!)

Sabi ko kay Kosa: Oo, idol ko kasi nung bata ako si Ching Balagtas... ;-)
(Me to Kosa: Yup, it's because Ching Balagtas was my idol when I was young...)

(Francisco Balagtas is a famous Filipino poet. Ching is used as a nickname for Francis, and other similar names.)

Sabi ni Kosa: Ah, Ching pala name ni Balagtas.
(Kosa replied: Ah, I didn't know that Balagtas' name was Ching.)

Sabi ko kay Kosa: Hehe, joke lang. Nakaka-inspire lang si Balagtas. Kita mo sa mga tula niya kung pano niya minahal si... Leonora ba name nung irog niya? I forgot... :-)
(Me to Kosa: Hehe, I was only joking. But Balagtas inspires me. You can see in his poems how he loved... Was Leonora his beloved's name? I forgot...)